5 Ways to NOT Suck in Life
This morning I woke up to the news that Fidel Castro had passed away last night.
Perhaps one of the most striking observations in the wake of the late dictators death is the amount of rejoicing taking place as a result.
I mean, how sad is THAT?!? That you die and people feel happy that you’re gone; your presence on this earth was just THAT destructive!!
Although on a completely different scale, it makes me think about toxic people who have left companies I’ve worked for or churches I’ve attended. They all had the same thing in common: They sucked! They sucked the joy out of things, they sucked your confidence from you, and they sucked your ability to be yourself with them. It’s no wonder that whenever they moved, left or got fired, people literally freakin’ celebrated!!
YOU don’t have to be that sourpuss in life, though. Matter of fact, becoming someone that makes others feel like a million bucks is not only possible but extremely fulfilling!
Here’s my list of 5 things you can do today to not suck! Do these things and you’re most likely to create a legacy where people actually miss you when you’re gone!
#1: Speak Life
I’ve never gotten into the trend of jokingly degrading people you love or being sarcastically cruel just to be funny. Everyone knows that words have the power to stick around longer than a physical wound ever could. So why do we do it?
Add in the latest trend of cyber bulling and we’ve got a whole hodgepodge of negative-vibe-hurling grinches. **Eww!**
There are too many people starving to be affirmed to stay on team “Nay Say”. You’d be surprised how many people have never even heard the words, “You look beautiful”, or “I’m proud of you”.
Start being that rare voice of encouragement and soon you’ll be known as someone who used the precious currency of communication to add value to people, not drain it.
#2: Be There for Your Friends & Family
As the old adage goes, “Talk is cheap”—which essentially means that if you don’t follow up your pretty words with some concrete action of being there for people when they need you, then you might as well keep your flattery to yourself.
Stop making excuses and show up to your friend’s business meeting. Attend your cousin’s album release party. Join that 5k. These little actions of showing up in spite of obstacles goes a long way in leaving a mark on those you love.
#3: Be Good to You
Many times people are like leaches to those around them because they’re not tending to their own needs and desires. They’re running so low on love, self-care, and happiness that they go after it in other people.
If you don’t want to be one of those sucking the life out of those you love, then learn how to get your own tank filled! Seriously; when’s the last time you tended to your emotional needs? What about taking care of your body with nutritious food, exercise, and good ‘ol sleep?
We underestimate the power of being good to ourselves and then wonder why people run away from us! It’s because the only thing that comes out of a body, soul, and spirit on “E” is negativity!
Love on you so that you relate to people from your overflow—not from your lack.
#4: Give a ‘Hoot’ About Others
There’s nothing as impacting on one’s life as seeing someone else go out of their way to make you feel special. That kind of thing does something to you!
Well ladies and gentlemen, you can do that too!
Think of other people’s needs and wants—not just your own—and then consider them, affirm them, and meet them!
Before long, you’ll start reaping what you sowed and people will trip over themselves to do the same for you! They call it Karma! Invest in it :-). Watch it boomerang right back to you!
#5: Apologize When You’re Wrong
Did you know that there are 5 different “Apology Languages” that people identify with? According to Gary Chapman in “Things I Wish I’d Known Before We got Married”, They are:
1. Expressing Regret
2. Accepting Responsibility
3. Making Restitution
4. Genuinely expressing the desire to change your behavior
5. Requesting Forgiveness
Sometimes the biggest fault in the people who suck is that with so many different ways to make amends, they rarely–if ever–became fluent in even one apology language!
So if you want to be a life-giver who people mourn yet fondly remember when you’re gone, then humble yourself upon recognizing your wrongs, and freakin’ apologize! Then, if you really want to be someone people can’t get enough of, learn which apology language most resonates with your loved ones (as well as which one is most important to you) then start speaking/communicating that!
In the words of Michael Jackson, let’s go ahead and “Heal the world; make it a better place…” starting with ceasing to suck!
From my treasure chest to yours,